quaggy: C.J. looking at a goldfish (Perplexity)
[personal profile] quaggy
Title: Untold Plans
Category:  Humor
Disclaimer: I do not own The West Wing or any West Wing characters.
Rating: PG-13
Notes: I originally wrote this as part of “Regrets.”  There wasn’t supposed to be any dialogue in that fic, but Sam and Josh had other ideas, which was fine.  But then they took over the whole thing, so I gave them their own place to argue.  I don’t know how Donna and Margaret got involved, though.



“You, son of a bitch!” Sam yelled, startling Josh from his perusal of budget reports.  “You got married!”

“Maybe,” Josh smirked, leaning back in his chair, his eyes traveling to the door that connected to the Oval Office to make sure that it was closed.

“You got married and you didn’t tell me!”  Sam continued to yell, but he couldn’t help grinning like the Cheshire Cat, so he couldn’t have been too mad.

“As a matter of fact, I did tell you,” Josh replied, calmly.

“You told me that you and Donna were getting married.  You did not tell me you were getting married on your lunch hour.”

“You didn’t ask.”  

“Because that’s something that most people would regularly think to inquire.”

“Sam, most people ask when the wedding is going to be!”

“You didn’t when I told you I was engaged.  Either time.”

“I was too busy trying to keep myself from asking why both times.”

“Oh, nice.  Very nice.”

“Hey, I know your track record with women, Sam.  In a room full of bright and attractive potential spouses, you will always find the most inappropriate disaster just waiting to happen.  How was I to know that, rather than some Lisa clone, Natalie was actually far better than you deserve!  How did you convince her to marry you anyway?”

“Oh and you can talk!  You couldn’t do better than a courthouse at noon?” 

“Unlike you, I do not need some big elaborate waste of money to feel married.  I just need her,” he says with heartbreaking sincerity. 

“And how does Donna feel about that?” Sam demanded, doing his best to squash the unmanly sentimental streak his friends words caused.

“Who’s idea do you think it was?!  I would eat fresh, molten rock for her.  Do you really think I wouldn’t sacrifice a day of my life if it meant I could say I was her husband at the end of it?!  A big wedding would take time and practically demand a whole bunch of stupid interviews simply because it sounds cute that we have the same job titles.  Why wait for that when, thanks to the great Commonwealth of Virginia, we could be joined in holy matrimony in a matter of hours?’

“How about so your friends and family could gather together and wish you well?”

“I’ve waited ten years, Sam.  I didn’t want to wait ten more seconds, let alone the eternity that it would take to coordinated everybody’s schedule.  But we’ll shoot for some sort of party this summer.”

“Ok then,” Sam replied and made to leave, but found himself opening his mouth again.  “I can’t believe you got married before I did!”

“Ahhh…” Josh responded, sagely.  “And now we come to the real source of your ire.”

“Shut up.”

“Make me.”

“At least promise me I’ll be there when you tell Toby?”

Josh said nothing, but smirked a little sheepishly.

“You already told Toby, didn’t you?” Sam sighed.

Josh still said nothing.

“He was there!?” Sam howled.

“He asked!” Josh shouted back, grinning from ear to ear.  “He asked when the wedding was.  Like a normal person.  So, I told him.  And he told me to expect him at the courthouse!”

“So it was just you, Donna and Toby.”

“And my mom.”

“Your mom’s in town?”

“She flew in last night.  She wanted to see me get married.”

“She asked when… Of course, she asked when,” Sam sighed as he answered his own question.

“First words out of her mouth.”

 “So, you, Donna, Toby and your mom.”

“And Charlie.”

“Charlie?!?!!”  Sam’s face was a picture of indignation, frustration and envy.

“He…”

“Asked.  Yes, I know.  Zoey and Ellie didn’t come too, did they?”

“No!  Why would you think that?”

“Well, I figured Charlie would tell Zoey, because Zoey likes you.  And she would probably tell Ellie who would then want to come because she likes Donna.”

“That’s way too complicated.  Besides, I told Charlie we were keeping it low-key.  But I couldn’t in good conscience tell him not to come when Toby had basically invited himself.”

“And because I didn’t ask, I didn’t get told?” Sam demanded, letting a little of the hurt he’d been trying to squash slip out.

“No!” Josh exclaimed, his teasing evaporating.  “Sam, I didn’t know it was going to be a thing when I told you.  The only person I had told was my mom and I was expecting her to want to come.  Geez, Donna was already trying to find her plane ticket.  And after I talked to Toby and Charlie, I couldn’t tell you because it would have been unfair.”

“Because I couldn’t come?” Sam asked, wondering if it was worse to be omitted because he hadn’t expressed enough curiosity or because there was not enough space.

“Yeah.  Because you had that meeting with the House majority leader and it would have looked suspicious if you suddenly had to cancel to go to lunch with Donna and me.”

“Oh, yeah,” Sam said, sheepishly.

“Not to mention the fact that it would also have all but sunked our chance to get that bill passed.  How did that go, by the way?”

“It went well,” Sam replied, donning on his Deputy Chief of Staff mantle.  “Finegold won’t make waves and Heller has withdrawn his objection.  Stalls will still be an obstacle, but nothing we can’t overcome.”

“Really?” Josh asked, surprised.  Finegold and Heller throwing their weight with Stalls was one huge time bomb.  And now it was totally defused.

“Yeah,” Sam replied, suddenly grinning.  “Consider it a wedding day gift.”

“Well, that's damn better than anything you could have gotten me at Pottery Barn.”

“Please.  Crate and Barrel, at the very least.” 

“So, we good?”

“Yeah.  Just invite me next time.”

“Like that’s gonna happen.”

“I won’t be invited to your next wedding either?”

“Get out of here,” Josh laughed, throwing a folder at him in mock anger.  “Or I’ll tell Donna you’re trying to marry me off to someone else!”

“Too late.  I witnessed it myself,” came a voice from the doorway.  Both men turned to see a very amused Donna leaning against the doorjamb.  Sam turned three shades of red.

“Hey,” Josh beamed.  “You’re here early!  What happened?”

“Margaret called me,” Donna replied as the redhead appeared next to her.

“I heard Ronna and Otto talking about a surprise reception and thought you would want to clear out before that could happen,” Margaret explained.  “I’ve rescheduled everything for both tomorrow and the rest of today, baring any unforeseen emergencies.  I’ll call you at home once I’ve confirmed the dinner plans.”

“That’s wonderful, Margaret.  Thank you.  Hey, Sam, want to come to dinner with us?  You don’t have plans with Natalie, do you?”  Josh asked, throwing on his jacket.

“No, she flew back to California for the week.  But don’t you want to… be alone?” Sam asked, stumbling for an euphemism. 

“We’ll do that later” Josh replied, though the way his armed was snaked around Donna’s body and the way she was leaning into his seemed to say that “later” meant in fifteen minutes when they got through the front door of their apartment. 

“So how many is that now?” Margaret asked.

“Let’s see… me and Donna, you, Sam, Toby, Charlie, Zoey and Ellie… Shut up, Sam… and my mom.  Unless you invited Annabeth?” Josh asked turning to his wife.  (Wife!)  Donna nodded, guiltily.  “Then, ten of us.  But don’t either of you tell anyone else, ok?  This is supposed to be low key!”

“Right,” Sam grinned.  “Better get out of here before the masses descend.”

“Yeah.”

“Bye, Sam!  Bye, Margaret!” Donna called out over her shoulder, as Josh propelled them down the hall.

Never in all their years in the White House had Sam or Margaret seen Josh and Donna move so fast.  And that was saying something.

Date: 2006-06-27 12:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seri-scribble.livejournal.com
Yay! Best exams are over gift EVER! Thank you thank you thank you!

“Ahhh…” Josh responded, sagely. “And now we come to the real source of your ire.”

“Shut up.”

“Make me.”


Love it! It's the 'Make me' that makes it art!

THANK YOU SO MUCH!

Date: 2006-06-27 01:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] olsonm-raymond.livejournal.com
I'm not Seri, but thanks Quaggy! :-)

Date: 2006-06-27 01:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gatsbyfan.livejournal.com
Yay, new Quaggy! Helps get rid of drivel that Gatz read because of irish and ana.

Loved the story! Poor Sam. He wasn't at his best friend's wedding and barely made it to the celebratory dinner.

Date: 2006-06-27 09:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] deelaa.livejournal.com
I feel sad for Sam.

I feel sad for me because I have this feeling there is some sort of inside joke in this about Ellie that I'm not getting. Maybe I'm imagining it.

Date: 2006-06-27 02:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] caz963.livejournal.com
This was fab, Quaggy! I can just see Sam getting (sort of) upset about this... and the Pottery Barn comment was brilliant (as was a lot else, which I won't quote, cos it'll take up too much space!)
But seriously, hun, sunked???? tut-tut...*g*

Date: 2006-06-27 04:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] caz963.livejournal.com
Hee! You can bug as much as you want, babe! I've actually started the first one, and should finish later... and I'm not at school Thurs or Fri this week, so hopefully will polish off the other one - if you've got anything else you wanna throw my way, now's the time!
(deleted comment)

Date: 2006-06-27 03:09 pm (UTC)
kathyh: (Kathyh west wing JD)
From: [personal profile] kathyh
Great Josh and Sam dialogue and I thing getting married in the lunch hour is so right for Josh and Donna. Very nice. Thanks.

Date: 2006-06-27 03:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rentypoo.livejournal.com
wonderful, quaggy! But the president is not amused. He better get invited to the reception, anyway.
(deleted comment)

Date: 2006-06-28 02:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] no-redlights.livejournal.com
loved that! Sam finding out all the people that were at the courthouse was hilarious and I totally got misty eyed at the " i waited 10 years i dont wanna wait 10 more seconds" part. great job!!

Date: 2006-06-30 01:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anatolealice.livejournal.com
I loved it Quaggy! Poor Sam missing out :-) Great way of inviting people though.

I see them getting married in a courthouse too. Very handy that one can do on no notice in Virginia.

Date: 2007-03-18 01:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] justdreaming88.livejournal.com
Oh squeeeee :D fantastic, I can just imagine it.

Date: 2009-09-25 03:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] farmerliz.livejournal.com
How did I miss this 2.5 years ago? I really don't know, but I found it on Caz's rec list, so all is well. Great fun!

Liz

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